“New year, New me!” If you want to annoy a number of people all at once without even trying, this is the phrase to utter.
“New year, New Me!” The phrase that has caused more eye rolls than Ugandan 2016 presidential candidates and their “manifestos”.
“New year, New me!” For some reason, this phrase is counted as just as bad as “It’s not you, it’s me” and I can I think if this phrase were a person they would be looked down upon with scorn worse than that that is often set aside for politicians.
And yes, we’ve all seen that meme, the one that causes everyone to join in on that bandwagon of the jaded folk and makes the “dreamers” hush and keep their dreams to themselves so that they don’t get laughed at.
But no, it’s not bullshit. Setting one’s mind to bettering oneself should not be regarded as bullshit. I know people find the whole concept of turning into a new person or simply changing just because the clock struck 00.01 for the first time in a new year absolutely ridiculous and also quite pretentious. But I’m the optimistic kind and I want to side with “New year, new me” believers. A year is comprised of 365 days. Who’s to say that within that time one would not have changed or developed into a new and better version of their selves. They say it takes 30 days to make or break a habit. Baby steps are what we all need to grow.
Months and years are merely a human design, something that we came up with, possibly so that we wouldn’t feel like we were going around in circles and to define this thing called time. It’s never too late to be a newer, better version of yourself. Whether this determination to “go and grow” and “move and shake” starts on the 1st of January at 00.01 or on the 13th or even some time later on in the year, it all comes down to, “what are you doing about becoming this “New me”?”
By writing this, even I am trying to pump myself up. So how do we manage to finally become this “new me”
- Make a plan, set goals, write them down and act on them aggressively.
I have set goals for 2016. Why? You may ask, because I think I’m finally ready to commit to something; no excuses, no holding back. In the previous years, I honestly didn’t make goals because I was afraid of getting to the end of the year and found myself lacking. And so I rolled with the “free falling” gang and achieving something huge was just a plus for me.
The mental space I was in at the time can easily be compared to that girl who continues to “hang out” and keep in touch with this guy and at the back of her mind she knows there’s something good here but doesn’t want to test it. Why? Because she’s convinced herself that she’s afraid of relationships and has clouded her mind with that silliness she decided to brand and name “trust issues”.
And so when things don’t actually work out, she shrugs and thinks to herself, “Oh well, I didn’t put my entire heart into that so whatevs” “No harm no foul” even though there’s a voice whispering, “What if?”
But this year is different, it’s the year where I tell myself that “trust issues” is just another name I have given that looming spirit of self-sabotage and that madness called “being afraid of just how great you can become” and finally commit to achieving a dream and fighting for it even if it means getting my heart broken along the way.
Better to have loved than to never have known love. So in the case of setting goals, I guess, this will be translated to, “Aim for the stars, even if you miss them, you will land on the moon” (is that how that phrase even goes?! Oh well, it serves the point I’m trying to put across.) I’ll take the moon any day than staying in one spot for the rest of one’s life, it’s a star as well afterall, isn’t it?
- Stock taking is important. Journaling is something you can try. You don’t even have to write a lot. Just write two or three lines.
I did 10 sit ups and 3 push-ups today.
I wrote 2000 words. Some of it sounded like crap but I think I’m close to what I want to really write about.
I didn’t curse out and/or threaten any one today
Then pump yourself up for the very next day. And journaling does just that because you’re able to go back and look at the progress you’ve made. How would this not excite you to be even better? I can’t even tell.
Take note of your not-so-fruitful days as well.
I lied that I was busy with work just so people wouldn’t badger me about going out.
I stalked my ex on Instagram. He has a dog now. He wore that shirt I bought him to what he said would be the one of the most important meetings in his life.
Of course you’ll be embarrassed and cringe over what you did or what you didn’t do. That’s a good thing. Now be your own therapist and ask yourself what happened during that particular day that made you fall back on what you set out to do. Then fix it.
Oh look, the “new you” is showing.
- Make yourself accountable to someone even when even though it’s your life. Tell at least two people about your plans and the new changes you plan to make. These should preferably be close friends or family, somewhat overbearing, persistent in-a-good-way type of friends, the kind who will every once in a while say something like,
“So you said you wanted to gain more muscle/write that book/start that campaign/go on a healthier diet/start that business, you haven’t talked about that even once since we started talking.”
“Why are you talking about the ex/needing a smoke/constantly talking about the way you hate you job? I thought we left that mess in 2015”
These friends will remind you that you had a mission to accomplish and that you’re either slacking or doing amazing well.
- You should have less “I will…”s and “I plan to…”s and have more “I have…” and “I’m done…”. Stop making everyday a Monday. “I’ll start on Monday/tomorrow”
Stop that madness, it will ruin you. If you find yourself exceeding one more “tomortow”, you know you need to take action.
- Build an “action group”. I would have said “support group” but no, that makes you seem weak and helpless and in need of crutches yet what we all need sometimes is a good firm shove.
Yes, they’ll be there to pick you up and encourage you when you feel like you’re failing and once they have picked you up they will push and pull you back into the right direction. Build an action group that’s preferably limited to people with the same goal and every so often meet and talk about what you have accomplished.
Baby steps, people, baby steps. But while you take your baby steps, remember that if you want to walk over and sit at the table with the “big” people and eat meat with them, you have to have grow some teeth and most of all, you have wean yourself off of stagnation.
To the new you!!!
Happy New Year!!!